Personal log, Stardate 74843.16.
My heart aches. Correction... my heart bleeds. When I first heard the reports about what happened in Engineering, I couldn't believe it. The entire thing sealed off, beta and gamma... two entire decks of people that got... that were...!
And that's not even considering the other decks, the other casualties. Colin and I had talked about this, I knew it was a possibility. But now that it's here, how do you not let it eat at you? I haven't been able to sleep. I haven't been able to get their faces out of my head. And Tom... Oh Prophets help me, Tom. You were like a brother to me. We'd done so much to get things fixed up after the last incident, and now it's ruined again. The whole thing is ruined. I'm so glad you don't have to see it... you'd be ... you'd be upset...
I need to go see the Chief in sickbay later. I'm trying to get the repair crews from the station to help get things patched. There's so much work. So many things to clear out, and I have to organize it myself. I can't trust the others yet, all the ones I could are hurt, gone, gone. Just... just gotta keep moving. Keep going. They're all counting on me to do this.
Colin's been trying to get in touch with me but I don't have time. I can't take time. I know if I see him I'll just fall apart, and what good will I be? I'm sorry. I'm so sorry. I hope you'll understand.
Prophets protect us and save us from ourselves. Honor the dead and their memories, may they rest in peace knowing their deaths weren't in vain. They shall be avenged.
Stamped,
Larel Neala
Lieutenant, Starfleet Border Patrol
Chief Engineering Officer, USS Astraeus
